I'll never be good enough.

So. You're still the same. What a waste of my time. 

What is your problem?!?!?!?!?!

I have two new pairs of shoes. Three, if you count the one in my closet. :D :D :D 

Well, today was the first day we did packing and it was a disaster:
- Labels didn't go on straight most of the time
- I kept forgetting to sign off that I was the packer
- I forgot, on multiple occasions, to photocopy the prescription when the patient was getting a partial supply
- I took ages to pack some prescriptions because I couldn't find the items even though they were RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES
- I had to ask other technicians for help for almost every single prescription (and I hate to bother others)
- I had to ask the typist to check whatever I'd packed but he just shook his head, WTF? He could've told me to ask someone else in a POLITE MANNER

There's probably more, but I can't remember. I was feeling severely uncomfortable today as well. Gee. 4 more weeks of this... My brain and body will degenerate!

IT HAS COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT I'M THINKING A LOT ABOUT FOOD THESE DAYS. IT'S BECOMING A PROBLEM ESPECIALLY SINCE I'M NOT AS SKINNY AS BEFORE. I HOPE I LOSE WEIGHT WHILE WORKING AT THE OUTPATIENT PHARMACY THOUGH, SINCE IT'S REPUTED FOR ITS BUSYNESS. AND I FELT LIKE TYPING IN UPPERCASE LETTERS, JUST BECAUSE.

I've gotten the recipe for buttercream frosting and cream cheese frosting so cupcakes are probably on their way! :D 

We saw quite a few doctors today... Weird. 

And I made beef bolognese for my 爱心便當 this week! :D

I received a pair of Toms for my birthday! (Albeit belated) Just what I wanted, really. :D I'm not too sure about the colour though. Mmhmm.

My sister is going to buy some for me and send them over in time for Christmas, whooo. I'm gonna get her stuff for her and send her a parcel in September. Heehee I love parcels! She's also sending me a belated birthday card. Whoo. 

I've mistyped Starburst almost every time I've tried to type it. It's like Starbust, backspace backspace, Starburst and repeat. D: What is wrong with me?!!?! 

Ooh I got a Topshop gift card today. :D I have no idea what the stored value is though, I guess I'll have to wait 'til 2 Sep to find out.

I'm so glad I can finally get down to studying :'3 No more assignments to worry about, just the exams.

I'm craving chwee kueh, all because of the smell of the chilli that my mom made (which incidentally tastes really good with microwaved eggs). The microwave oven is seriously the best invention ever, my favourite appliance.

I bought bubble tea today and the machine didn't seal the cup's contents in it so it was leaking into the plastic carrier but no worries, I came home and poured everything into a huuuge cup, including the tea in the carrier. :D I hate wasting stuff. (I remember the time when my dad pissed me off so bad that I slammed the whole plastic cup on the table and the cup broke and my strawberry red tea spilled EVERYWHERE, and then I had to clean the damn mess up which was pretty stupid of me to have taken my anger out on the poor cup in the first place. Stupidity at its best. 

And wut, I am being amazingly pissed, annoyed, angry, livid, (insert adjective here), etc at this whole matter. Ha ha childish.

Argh. Ramble ramble.

2 x birthday cake = I'm stuffed!

Edit: Oohwee I was just reminded that I have 3/5 of a roll of film in my quadcam that's still unexposed, ie. unused. Soon soon soon 2 weeks! And mm, I have a Tumblr account but I do not know how to reblog stuff and all that yet. I know how to follow others though. I'm considering a Twitter account to stalk all the celebs. Jeesh, "hi, I'm a stalker".

Should I get a pair of fake Toms? It's a bit of a stretch for me to pay $80 for the genuine ones! Asjhg I don't know. 

I reeeaaaalllyyyy (say this aloud) want an iPod Touch!

Arghhhh I just spilt a whole cup of iced milo all over the table, my laptop, my lecture notes, my brick-of-a-phone and the tablecloth. Urgh why am I so clumsy??? :( 

Hahaha I bought 4 (back) issues of Teen Vogue for my sister today for $10. Great value. I could have gotten other magazines but the rest were kinda meh. 

It was a good day today :)

Dude, stop digging your ears in the train. Gross much. :|

I saw birthday pictures on Facebook. We were pretty close a year ago. Now I'm just dipshit. And lonely. Screw this shit. Ugh I should stop e-stalking.

I need to figure out why phantom question marks are appearing at the end of every sentence in my emails... It's making me look pretty stupid, especially when I have to email the lecturers. I need to go to the gym too. My INNER THIGHS are jostling for space. I need to start my pharmacotherapy revision as well. I need to stop procrastinating. :( 

I've gotten my mid-term results for Communication Skills already. I guess I could have done better for the presentation... 

I shall attempt to get a $6 haircut. I hope it goes well man.

I want Pukka... Fresh mint ice-cream mmmm :3

I shall post about further studies another day. It's truly a FML kind of thing. :( FUUUUUUU--

I shall head to bed early, even though I practically slept the entire day. YAY for days with no school. 

I'm still up at 12.09am because I'm doing this stupid presentation for this stupid module that's only worth two stupid credits (I think). I'm tired :( CAN'T WAIT to get home tomorrow to crash. I miss my bed.

At least I had a semi-productive weekend for once. :)

I want to go for a body check-up, maybe not the full works but just blood cholesterol/glucose tests. It's a little bit of a worry, especially when you have things like FAMILY HISTORY. 

Meep meep. 

Oh yes, my new top and purse-wallet thingy are here in SG!!! Excited. 

I think I want 200USD worth of stuff from UO. I am riddikulus.

Crap, that coconut green bean soup is starting to give me a stomachache. 

Meh, I was staring at the word "hospital" for so long that it started to look weird. But then again, words always look weird after you've stared at them for some time huh?

I'm really sick of being the one that takes the initiative all the freaking time. 

Obsessed with mint lately - Fresh Mint ice-cream, mint nougat...

There's this new ice-cream place along Aroozoo Ave. I tried their Fresh Mint ice-cream yesterday and it was alright. Not exactly Haagen Dasz, but beggars can't be choosers. 

Craving sushi (as usual).

Motocross racing is really cool! 

I have a test next week and a presentation the week after. I must be pretty stressed, my hair's falling out. :(

---

If your text messages are so bloody precious, you can keep them for yourself. Really. I don't see the need for us to go back to where we were before everything happened. :|

If you don't have anything nice to say, you could always keep your mouth shut.

The pharmacology tutorial questions just make me convulse... It doesn't help that I'm really tired from sneezing and a dose of Piriton. Ack ack ack.

Pfftttt I'm talking in my sleep again. Not cool.

UGH. 

You've managed to melt this heart of ice, you've managed to break through this stony resilience.

I would be plain mean if I ignored everything.

How do I compose something without making it sound awkward? 

I need to find a way to fall asleep, pronto. I don't want to fall asleep at 4.30am again! :( I just took Piriton so I hope that helps. This screams DRUG ABUSE!!!

Wow your vulgarity-filled post shows how mature you are. It also shows how much you love and respect people. 

TWO THUMBS UP.

So I got my hair cut today which was not bad BUT the way the hairstylist washed my hair, I think I'm balder now THANKS. Traction alopecia much?

BUY MY STUFF OKAY? :D

I was about to text you to say that I've missed you, missed having you as a friend, missed doing stuff with you, missed pouring out my heart to you, missed telling you about certain things that only you would understand. I miss you even more when I remember how you used to call me Fut, which ended up sounding like Fart most of the time.

BUT

When I think about the things that happened in HK, the things which I never thought you would do, I'll take a step back and remind myself that I don't need this, not then, not now, not in the future. I don't have to put up with things like that. Moreover, I don't like the people you mix with. I dislike how you try SO hard to make yourself appear to be "cool".

AND

I will never be able to accept how I feel so inferior compared to your other friends. I hate feeling inferior in friendships and relationships, you know? But you did not understand that. The chief reason for many of our fights. 

Sometimes, I wished we were still friends, so that I can tell you about anything and everything, from trivial stuff like what I've purchased online, to the serious stuff like LLC. I need support sometimes you know. But it seems you're fine where you are, without me. I don't think I could give our friendship a go again without the whole issue hanging over our heads like a dark cloud.

So I guess I'll actually try to move on, like I've appeared to. 

I think my grammar's kind of off but eh, whatever.